...yeah, a dumb fish wiggled on the line and smacked over my can of the cool, sweet, nectar. The little shit. He couldn't even get the whole lure into his cake-hole. Complaints from a retired guy falling on deaf ears, I know, but the little shits should have some respect for a 3 war vet. A little background...the cuz and I, recently reunited family-wise, who share a fondness of fast machines, who's Harley Pic I can't find at the moment would agree. I should have picked the hook and threw this little shit onto the pavement.
All I have to say is... Eagle Claw results brother. Bass flow to the patient however...
Yeah baby... how about another...
Yeah, that's another one...want some more?...
Just so's you're sure that I'm a professional...
Yeah, I know a few things about a few things. Fishing is one of them.
update 1!!11
Fishing report today - brisk. Two largemouths and a bluegill in about fifteen minutes. I barley had time to swill down a couple of ice-cold stupids, the action was that fast paced. Though, no further catches of Walter (pictured above, an inside baseball reference to On Golden Pond, remarkable only for the fishing scenes, Henry's dry humor and the last time Jane Fonda was worth looking at in anything other than a gas chamber). I've caught him twice now and I think he's in the deep hole at the west end of the pond re-evaluating his menu choices. It's for sure his Bassy lips need a rest. The younger bass continue to hit the Rapalas like Bikers at a highschool cheerleader meet. The tadpoles that have hatched three weeks ago have apparently grown froggy-legs and are venturing out to deeper water only to meet an evolutionary pre-ordained end. No less than two spots at any time on the surface of a 1/4 acre pond were in a continuous roil of tad-frog ending turbulence. It's a slaughter out there my friends.
Now comes the time wherein I help you, dear reader. Pictured below is the original floating Rapala lure, in standard gold. Ladies who have men in their lives who fish, take note. These simple lures are unchanged over many years because they work. The original floating Rapala will catch more fish than everything else combined in any given tackle-box. They catch fish when nothing else will. The only better bait is live bait. If you need an inexpensive gift idea here it is:
A must have in every fresh water tackle box. In silver and gold. Don't get silly in the store and drawn off by fancy colors and other shiney shit, like deep divers, or that stupid jointed crap. These are all you gals need to know, in this 2in. size and the next one up at about three inches long. You'll be an instant hit for less than 10 bucks. And, google up the Rapala knot and show your dimwit how to tie the thing on right without having to use a swivel clip, which turns big bass off almost immediately in clear water. If he waves you off with the gaff that "I knows how to tie a lure, woman", you can say: "Any knot that grips the eyelet will make it swim sideways, stupid. The company website says so". A light slap on the back of the head for emphasis works well here. Then wear some daisey-duke shorts while you're fishing. You will be a hero, trust me. There, I've struck my blow for freedom today.
In related news, I have recently placed an 8 dollar Rapala, of other design, firmly twelve feet up and three feet out over the water in a tree limb next to the pond. First responder measures were taken, to no avail. Sometime this weekend, a song will sound, and that song will be the song of the 1978 14 inch bar SKIL chainsaw, or the 1973 Husquavarna, whichever I can get to run first, and that song will be loud and brief me hardees, and accompanied by acrid blue smoke. And Giai will weep, that bitch. Then the number 4 Rapala sinker, in original gold, will re-take it's rightfull place in slot number four, second shelf, in the tacklebox of woe.
In other news, my rear end is making noise. It's not the noise that may or may not result in a blue to orange colored flame. I think this is why:
Don't tell me about sawdust. I know about the damn sawdust already. Noise going away does not equal problem solved. This SOB needs to live until I get hired by some entity willing to pay me a sick amount of coin to fly rubber dog-shit into Bagdad. And no crap about 52 miles an hour either, this was in a parking lot. A nursing home parking lot.
That first paragraph had me laughing my ass off and definitely brought back some real good memories of simpler times. Thanks for the smile.
CUZ
Posted by: Ron Layko | May 01, 2009 at 04:48 PM
Cuz, if I can finagle a trip up to the land of round on the ends and hi in the middle, we will have to go to Raybucks for an afternoon of beers and bluegill abuse. According to Google, the pond is still there.
Posted by: Smokin | May 01, 2009 at 09:17 PM
I have been cravin' pan fried bluegill for about 15 years now. The only thing from my marriage I miss.
Damn.........but I will admit, catchin' bass is more fun. But bluegill tastes much better!
Glad you're enjoying yourself!
Posted by: Tammi | May 02, 2009 at 07:26 PM
I grew up eating them pan fried too, in of all things, Betty Crocker Pancake Mix. A dredge in B.C. then a light dusting with salt and pepper is surprisingly good. Since these many years with the Department of Defense, I have come to use and prefer House Autry. Mostly because we've lived in Miss., N.C., and Fla. and that's all we could find. Anyway, House Autry works great on catfish, gator, rattlesnake, bass and nearly anything else you could run across needin killin. It's good stuff. Here's how I fix mine:
3/4 cup House Autry Seafood Breader
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp Black Pepper
1/4 tsp garlic powder
3 - 6 brim fillets or about a 1/2 LBS of anything else you kilt (fresh).
Mix the dry ingredients in a cereal bowl.
Melt 1/4 stick butter and a slash of olive oil in a pan, just a tick higher than medium heat. Enough for the butter to sizzle slightly.
Coat the dry, cleaned, fillets in the breading mix and fry in the pan for a minute or two on each side. Long enough to be golden brown/slightly brown on each side.
Enjoy.
This dish goes exceedingly well with a side of fried taters and onions, and a cucumber-tomato salad.
About 14 Molsen's doesn't hurt either.
Posted by: Smokin | May 02, 2009 at 10:11 PM
Fishing, ah that brings back some horrible memorys of grandma's house.
Still can't eat fish to this day unless its square and breaded and comes out of a box.
Posted by: Quality Weenie | May 04, 2009 at 12:12 PM
QW, that's too bad. We had great times growing up catching and chowing down.
Posted by: Smokin | May 04, 2009 at 11:05 PM
Thanks for the tips Smokin’, got a Rapala but not in Gold, gots to gets me one.
I’ll try the recipe too, I usually just flour and egg wash it.
Great pics and nice catchin’, I’m very envious and reading to get my line wet myself. Though the bass will have to wait, the Pike are biting this time of year around these parts (Western Upstate NY).
Posted by: tim | May 05, 2009 at 01:07 PM
Here's a tip ... worms, there free round these parts. But once they get all dried and crispy you'll have to fight the dogs for them. The dogs love them some worm jerky.
And noise coming from a rear end, no matter what type of rear end is bad news.
Posted by: Quality Weenie | May 05, 2009 at 01:59 PM
Tim, depending on light and water clarity, we usually switch back and forth between the gold and silver Rapala's and see what works better. Sometimes it's silver in low light and gold mid-day, sometimes opposite. Sometimes it's plain ole worms too.
If you're near the Thousand Islands area, I'm jealous. That area has to rock fishing wise.
I highly recommend trying some Bisquick or any other reasonable pancake mix as a fish breader base. Add some salt, pepper, a little garlic powder. Egg wash is a personal choice. The question is how thick do you want the breading to be. Egg wash makes it thicker. As flight surgeons nag me in an ever increasing manner, anything that decreases fried breading helps me. But do not heal to my lead on that if you lack the need. Eat a stick of butter, club a seal, burn a tire and bread your fish in a loaf of wonder bread. God Bless ya.
Rapala Originals are fairly inexpensive lures compares to what else is out there right now too.
QW. Worms yeah I know. Worms are the second highest expense for us in Canada after beer and back bacon. And whiskey too. Okay, they're somewhere in there around the toilet paper level.
Hey, you live in Michigan, isn't the worm your state bird?
Just so you know, I have completed the Grande GM Vs. Ford drive off and after 10 years, I'm going back to Ford Trucks. The Expedition has outlasted and outperformed the GMC in nearly every category. Less Maint., less crap and BS. My next truck will be a Ford, AND IT WILL ROCK AS NOTHING BEFORE HAS EVER ROCKED!!!!
Stop letting your dogs eat worms. That's not right.
Posted by: Smokin | May 05, 2009 at 10:54 PM
I hadn't tried the BC. I use dry Drakes. Kinda corn mealy.
I'll put that on my list. If I ever get Blue Gill again........blue gill and venison back strap. Damn....sometimes I really miss the "old days".
Posted by: Tammi | May 06, 2009 at 08:42 AM
Word on the street is if you do get to Raybuck's, practice C&R due to mercury...and the old Carbon & Limestone, like the dwarfes in Fellowship of the Ring, dug too deep and hosed the entire aquafer around there.
I seem to recall Hungry Jack more than BC or Bisquick, but any would work in a pinch.
And for the wive's purchasing it is the number 11 and 13 original floating Rapalas. If you can find one from about 10, 15 years ago, they're much better. Rapala changed the design lately where they added a bit of a hump behind the eyes. Not as effective as the older design, but still very good. I'll add the blue scheme to gold and silver for more southern waters, which seem to match up better with the shad we have around here. Striper seem to like it better anyway.
No comment on the Rapala knot. . .you know who you are!
Posted by: Hugo | May 06, 2009 at 10:33 AM
Thanks for the tips Smokin’, got a Rapala but not in Gold, gots to gets me one.
Posted by: Anton | October 19, 2009 at 06:52 AM