islam and beers

I've read enough of the actual Islamic scholar writings to know that I will stick my head into an oven before page three.  Either they are all horrible writers or the translation is always pitiful.  It all comes across as wandering, non-sensical crap to me.  So I found an executive summary of sorts at Modern Crusader.  I particularly enjoyed the revelation that mohammed, in creating islam, continued several of the pre-islamic pagan worshipping practices of his tribe.  The kissing of the rock at the ka'ba, throwing stones to ward off satan, are practices derived from pre-isalmic paganism and idol worship in ancient saudi arabia.  They also make a case for the origin of allah to be the pre-islamic pagan diety Hubal, the Moon-God of whatever group of camel humpers were actually in the area of mecca, worshipped as late as the time of muhammed's own father.  Hubal, an import-god from syria, can be traced back to Baal, a god of the philistines, also referenced in the Bible as Baal-Zabub or,

wait for it...

Beelzebub. 

Yes, Beelzebub. 

Beelzebub in the Bible was a fellow fallen angel of Lucifer,

a biblical Lieutentant of Satan.

You Hear me?  I SAID S.A.T.A.N.!!

What a kneeslapper. Anyhow, Hubal, represented by a human statue missing it's right hand, was humped across the desert from somewhere in syria all the way to mecca and placed within the Ka'ba next to or on top of a big black meteorite that had fell nearby, scaring the shit out of the locals.  Apparently, if a stone falls out of the sky and sufficiently scares your grandmother, the proper response is to put that stone in a place of prominence in your church.   Dumbass monkey-people.  Hubal and the meteorite became linked over time. Even after muhammed successfully hijacked all the Hubal worshippers via a semantic  common link to the word, allah, and trashing Hubal's statue, pre-islamic hilljacks by the thousands continued to run circles around the black rock, begging to know if today is a good date to pick dates. 

That he (muhammed) did nothing to stop this ridiculous behaviour is considered part of the proof that these are the origins of his assinine cult. At the time it was well accepted that allah and Hubal were one in the same. This same meteor is the one that twelve hundred years later, on each anniversary, hundreds of towel heads stampede each other to death as they kiss it and run around it during their stupid holiday that comes before their other stupid holiday known as ramadan. 

For the curious, Hubal's missing right hand was replaced by the meccans with a hand cast in solid gold (coughmichaeljacksoncomplexcoughagain).  He also came complete with a set of ten (or seven) arrows, which the monkey people would throw into the air for the purposes of determining who to marry, when to plant crops and where to poo.

What a joke of a religion.  If it weren't for the tragedy of the millions of murders and untold human suffering committed in the name of islam, it would be comical.

Don't bother making comments about the Evil Crusaders or the Spanish Inquisition, the Crusades were in response to the Ottoman (islamic) invasion of europe, and the spanish were just pricks, none the less, both occured OVER A THOUSAND years ago.  Doctrinal Islam still promotes slavery, today, in the year 2006.  Moral relativism DENIED.

After reading more of Selemi's papers, I'm thinking about a compare and contrast piece between islam and Ghostbusters.  I think I can pull it off.

My religious background is Roman Catholic. We all went to church every week growing up. Except for grandpa.  He said he didn't need to go because "church was for bad people". We still have a huge laugh over that.  He never beheaded anyone though.